Nobody likes an intrusive thought. Intrusive thoughts can come out of nowhere and stay stuck in our brains causing us to feel anxious, depressed, or fearful. They can quickly become the focus of our attention, making it difficult to think about much else. We wonder what they mean. We feel bad and sometimes ashamed for thinking such things. We dwell on them.
Intrusive thoughts often involve sexual, violent, or socially unacceptable images or acts. They can play on our deepest fears and concerns. People that experience intrusive thoughts often live in fear that they will do the very thing they are thinking about. They are anxious that such thoughts make them a terrible person.
People who experience intrusive thoughts are often afraid to share them with others who can help because they are embarrassed. That is why we are going to talk about them in this blog post.
Dispelling Myths
There are a lot of myths about intrusive thoughts. One that is most common is because you are thinking a thought, it must mean you want to act on it. That is simply not true. When an unwanted thought enters our brains, we fight it. And the more it doesn’t align with our core beliefs and values, the more we fight it. And, the more we fight it, the more it sticks. It is a vicious cycle.
If the content of the thought doesn’t fit with a person’s true identity and values, the subconscious mind wants it to go away. For example, many people who have thoughts about hurting themselves or others value their lives and the lives of others very much, and people who think about cheating on their significant other care deeply about their relationship.
Another myth is every thought we have is worth examining. That is also not true. Intrusive thoughts are not messages, red flags, signals, or warnings despite how they feel. They are just thoughts that entered our brain, maybe because of something we read or saw on media, that we want to go away.
Learning to Let Go
When you notice an intrusive thought you must point out that it is an intrusive thought, and that is all. Label it as intrusive and vow to not worry about it. Focusing on it will only make it worse.
Everyone has occasional weird, bizarre, socially improper, or violent thoughts. Just because you are having the thought, as we discussed above, doesn’t mean it is an impulse to be acted on. It is not something you want to do subconsciously just because you are thinking about it. Rather it is a junk thought to be overlooked and thrown away but first, you have to learn to let it go.
The key to letting it go is to not focus on it. Don’t get involved in the thought. Notice it, label it and then turn to something else. If you don’t pay attention to it, it will quickly go away.
Struggling to Let Go
If you are an anxious person you might have trouble letting an intrusive thought go away unexamined. You worry about it and what it means and let that concern take over. You look for reassurance that the thought is not true.
When you have an intrusive thought that you are struggling to let go of, you need to reason with yourself. Tell yourself “this thought isn’t even interesting,” “it is not true,” “that is absurd” “no way would I ever do that,” “go away,” and it will fade away.
Try to not engage with the thought. Don’t try to push the thought out or avoid it but rather acknowledge its existence and then label it as not true.
Keep Going
As difficult as it can be to let go of intrusive thoughts, the more you do it the easier it will become. The key is to keep going on with whatever you were doing when the thought enters your mind. Do not try to figure out what it means or delve deep into where it came from.
Give yourself time for it to pass on its own. Accept that it may come back, and that is ok. Remember the thought is at odds with your true self so your brain is fighting to let it go.
Get Help
If you are struggling with frequent intrusive thoughts, don’t hesitate to reach out to a licensed mental health professional for help. A counselor or therapist can help to guide you so that the thought no longer has control.
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The professionally trained and licensed counselors at Rooted & Rising Therapy in Bridgeville have openings. Our practice specializes in treating individuals through years of experience, we’re confident that no problem is too great to overcome. Through therapy, there is always a way to address the issues you face and learn coping strategies to help you both right now and in the future. Just call our office at (412) 228-8489 or email us at info@rootedandrisingtherapy.com to get started to feeling better today. We are here for you.